I broke up with him because i felt it was the right thing to do but im sad. advice.?<3?

Have you ever had to break up with someone/ let go because they diddn't bring the best out of you. I became closer with this boyfriend than i ever have with any other and it kills me %26amp; i'm so sad and screwed up right now but i honestly thought he was holding me back, and i just could never ever get myself to fully trust him. His personality started changing and he seemed to careless its like he only showed he cared when he knew he might lose me. Now im 16, but very mature for my age %26amp; see the thing is i honestly think part of me will always love this boy just because. ugh =[ im so sad right now but things were getting worse by the minute. i don't know. this is horriable im so sad right now, i feel heartbroken. it almost seems stupid to breakup with someone you care about and have such strong feelings for because they brought out alot of negative things in you. hes the first boy i became somewhat physically close to as well and that makes it even worse. also he never wanted to know anything personal like things in the past, future plans. it seemed like it was based sexually but i refuse to have sex sex at 16. i dont know =/ he did know how to make me sooo happy at times.





advice. stories. anything. i could really use it right now.





thank you%26lt;3I broke up with him because i felt it was the right thing to do but im sad. advice.?%26lt;3?
I've had to breakup with a boyfriend before too. I hated it and yeah it totally sucked. I was heartbroken and i didnt know what to do...so I dated him again. He changed for me =]. We worked on our strong points in our relationship and our weak points and we were very happy together. All in all, maybe you should give him a second chance. Let him know what you didn't like about the relationship and maybe they will improve. gl x]I broke up with him because i felt it was the right thing to do but im sad. advice.?%26lt;3?
You want a story i will give you one. I've said it on her before so if you've come across it before don't be surprised. When i say bad relationship, i mean bad in every way.





5 years ago i met a guy. Two actually. But the second one came and went within 8 months. The first i was on and off again for 3 years (excluding the time i was with the second one). I loved him more than anything. We weren't super close friends due to the fact that we were constantly fighting. He lied and cheated so many times, i honestly lost count. And i was stupid for sitting there and taking it. I really only took that for almost 6 months when he wanted a relationship in 2 week on, 2 week off increments. Every couple of weeks he'd be with other people. The weeks he was with me, he cheated with those same people. It got to the point where he didn't even bother hiding it so much. That has to be the most unhealthy relationship i was ever in. And i ended it, but only the title girlfriend went away. We were essentially in a friends with benefits relationship without most of the benefits. There was no sex, no making out. Just a rare kiss every now and then. Always talk about getting back together but it never went anywhere. The second year went by exactly like that.





He was bad in school and failed the GEE. He joined the military and left a couple of months later. When i say it's the best thing that's happened to us, i mean that. He tried a few more times to get sex before he left, making promises to try things long distance. I said no sex and after he left, it's like we never even met. Never called, never emailed, nothing. However, he did communicate every day with some of our mutual friends; so i knew it was just me he was avoiding. Almost another year passed exactly like that. I had a couple relationships that year and for the most part, didn't think much about him until he came back for a visit now and then. The visits consisted of him trying to fakely rekindle things enough to get sex but i refused and he went back home and back to avoiding me. I did the same.





My senior year of high school i had 2 classes each day, so i got off early. On his last vacation here that i know of, he told me he loved me. I had waited so long to hear those words but i didn't believe them. I was immune to that from all the previous bullsh*t. Somehow he convinced me to give him one last shot. I decided that this would be my last shot; his one last chance before i permanently cut him off. We finally had sex. He acted as though it meant something and i tried to be happy but i was worried it wouldn't last. I was right. At the end of his vacation he went back home and back to the multiple girls he'd been having sex with. He'd called me 3 days after he got home and i spent most of the time on the phone with his roommate while he found a way to avoid me as usual. The next time i heard from him was to tell me he was going to Iraq. I said ok, he said ok, bye. That one was like a slap in the face.





Close to graduation, a friend of his who i never really liked (but unfortunately liked me) came over and started trying to flirt. I ignored it as i'd always done and he finally blurted out that my ';guy'; (I won't give names) was out f*cking 2 different people and asked me why i even cared. My honest reaction: i wasn't angry, wasn't hurt, wasn't surprised. I'd finally gotten to a point where i'd expected to be lied to and it didn't even bother me. I just acknowledged it and moved on like it was nothing.





Sometime in june/july this year he called. I've heard he has a fiance but he never mentioned that to me on the phone. To be honest i hope for her sake, he's changed. If not, i feel sorry for her and what she'll go through. However he did mention us. I closed that conversation and we haven't spoken since.





You don't ever want to be in a position where you try to see past awful things in a relationship for the very rare good things. I was not attached to this guy for the entire time he was involved in my life. In fact, i had 5 or 6 other boyfriends since we'd broken up. It is hard to move on but trust me when some people are out of your life, you will not regret getting rid of them. Looking back on that i know i was being stupid and blind. You don't ever want to feel like that.
Hey gurl, don't beat yourself up about this. You have done the right this about this relationship you felt that you didn't trust him and that he didn't care about your past and your future. You can't a relaitonship that is based on sex ?, because your loving the other parts, but not what in the heart. You did the right thing by saying no. Have you ever heard the saying that everything happens for a reason?, and by every event it makes you stronger?, consider this as a lesson, make it postivie than a negivtive. I was one in a terriberly friendship with three guys, they use me and abused my personally space, emociontally hurt me inside. It was the hardest thing i have ever had to do, I said ';NO';. I ended the friendship and everything. Months later i kept on getting harrased rumors going around the streets made me really uncomfortable. My house, friends, got egged, the house got rocked, they turned off the hot water system at my mums house. Everything. So i went to the cops and made my statment they got so angry and threatened me!. Ok my point is that you did the right you followed your and did what you belived, so did i, other wise i would of kept hurting. You should feel proud of yourself. You may not now but you will later in life!. Good luck gurl!.
I know almost exactly what you felt.


I was involved with someone about 3 years ago.


I was 16 and the other person was about 12 when things turned into something more.


[[ I know what people will think, this was a total bs relationship]]


But i can't explain it, only if i explained in person, but that would take a long time..but it was like whenever we looked in to each other's eyes, we could just stare for forever. Everytime we touched, i had to take a big deep breath. My heart races and my breathing slows down.]]


It was never confirmed any sort of relationship, but i think i fell almost head over heels in love.


I still love the person to this very day.


I've never wanted anything but the best for the person.


We were really ';attached,'; for almost a year, almost hanging out everyday, because we were neighbors.


It was an unexpected relationship, but we both just went with it.


In the end, I had to put myself first even though I loved the person with all my heart, to the point where i my heart ached at the thought of leaving or being without them. I left and ignored the person for almost a year because i thought i could block out the pain.


The person couldn't seem to understand some of what i felt, like the deeper side of me. It was all physical ish as well. We were really intimate, nothing sexual though. Just holding hands, touchy, hugs and what not.


i can't go into to much because then this would take up SOO much space. lol








[[ some people said what i felt THEN, might not have been love, because I was young, but now that I'm 18 and a lot more mature and understand these feelings and more conscious and aware of myself and others, I do believe that i still Love and deeply care for the person.]]

















anyway, i basically did the ';dumping,'; even though I ended up breaking my heart into a million pieces.





I'm sorry for what happened.


I know how much it can hurt.


And I know I'll always love this person, because it too, was my first relationship.
I don't think you deserve to say something like ';I'm very mature for my age'; just because you've had what you consider a mature relationship. I don't even understand what part of that relationship was mature. I understand that it was serious and it affected you a lot. I can even sympathize with that. But besides that, the fact that you're only 16 means that you have a very long way to go. I'm not going to tell you not to mourn, by all means, mourn as long as you feel you need to. Eat ice cream, stay in bed, watch sad movies and cry to your friends. But the day will come when you realize you feel okay without him. And then you're going to remember my advice and think ahead. Because even though he's your first love and he took a lot from you, you still have a lot to give. You're not going to look back at this and feel broken a long time from now, just remember that.





And soon, you're going to love like you were really meant to love. Love brings out the best in people and it sounds like the guy you were with didn't know how to love you. And in turn, it made you incapable of loving him the right way. It even made you incapable of loving yourself. So take my advice and learn a little bit more about yourself before jumping into another fiasco like this. Pay attention to yourself and not just to someone else and what that someone else wants.





Good luck. :)
well u not having sex with him was a good choice. Dont get back with him not unless u think he has made himself worth it. And maybe he got too conftarble around you. But the again u guys are so young and remember alot of girls mature faster than guys ( im not sayig everyguy is like that tho) so give it some time breath think about things have some fun with your friend and try to brush this off for a bit. If he realy cares about u HE WILL COME TO YOU , in some sort of way he will try and talk to u. Don't get back with him. im 19 i was there once i should know n sum guys need a wake up call its not what it used to be bak then
heeey hun, awwh i totally understand how you feel and i was


in that position for the most part with my ex bf.. sometimes you gotta let go of someone you love because its for the best. i dated this guy for 4 months and i was so into him. we had a really fun relationship but thats all it was. he was never interested in my past, my goals for the future, my favorites/dislikes.. etc


he used to lie to me so i couldn't trust him. and now that i think of it he made me more upset with his lying, and no effort of trying to understand me. is he trying to pressure you to have sex? because i don't really understand the last comment you made.. and as for him only showing he cared when he was about to lose you .. he needs to care about you EVERYDAY, make you smile %26amp; laugh %26amp; feel good about yourself. maybe he's not the right guy for you and i bet deep down inside you know that too. i understand your so heartbroken right now, and you probably will be for a lil while.. but in the long run this is the best for you. don't you wanna be with a guy that LOVES to here about ur past, your ideas, your future goals.. ? don't you wanna be with someone who is going to make you feel special all the time, you deserve that ! you should be with someone that brings out the BEST in you!! i hope i've helped you out at all!
tell him what you've writen up here!


i've had an experience like this in my life aswell, but i never went back to the girl i loved, and i really regret it.


when i think back, there are so many things i could have done differently, and if i she told me these things, and i knew these at the time, i'm sure i would have changed for her.


my advice is to go back and tell him how you feel and see how he reacts, if he's willing to change, give him a chance, if he refuses, then you'll know he's just not good enough for you.
I was your age once and I broke up then missed him. Then I went to a party latter and got raped by him. What a dam mistake I made it hurts to this day because I never turned him in. My children I have taught well don't have sex and stay with someone for that reason. Trust your heart and move on. You are still young go with your gut feelings you know what is right from wrong. Stay strong get a education and make the best of it . It is your life and you don't get a second chance in life. God Bless You Keep You Safe and have the Best New Year Ever Yahoo Child That Is A Smart !6 Year Old
Are you on your period? Sorry but my gf broked up with me 5 times because of it but this was 3 years ago, shes very happy with me now and love me more than ever when she gave me another chance (I don't know what I did from the start, she sometime admit it was her period)





Edit: Uhh...O crap I just notice he doesn't talk about future plans or anything? My gf and I used to do that a lot... and still do actually... hmm... Idk, and I didn't have sex with my gf yet either, we'll be doing that when we are married, 1 more year, I'll be doing it out of love, I did wait for her:P, see if he changes for you if he doesn't change than you pretty much lost nothing therefore... you shouldn't be sad, you need to keep searching for a better guy, but try to see if he changes for you!
you have it all figured out.





he is just too immature for you. and both of you have different priorities - his being able to advance to you physically.





it is quite painful because as you have said he is the first... ever..you love him but you know he is just not the one. you made the right choice.





trust me.. you will find someone more deserving of the kind of love that you offer. just keep keep on enjoying your life for now, with friends, and family, and eventually you will find the right person who would treat you with care and give you the love that you should be getting.